As the church, we exist to glorify Jesus— the One who has saved us— in everything we do. When our eyes are on Jesus, we will be a healthy church. When our eyes get off Jesus, we will become an unhealthy church. Diotrephes was a church leader whose eyes had turned away from Jesus, leading to many problems in the church. From his mistakes, we can learn a lot about what a healthy church should look like.
We’re going to do two things today.
First, we will unpack some behind-the-scenes information regarding the man mentioned in this portion of the letter. Then, we will seek to draw some application from this man's life.
Let’s dive in.
“9 I have written something to the church, but Diotrephes, who likes to put himself first, does not acknowledge our authority. 10 So if I come, I will bring up what he is doing, talking wicked nonsense against us. And not content with that, he refuses to welcome the brothers, and also stops those who want to and puts them out of the church.”
Right off the bat, I want us to notice how we could have had a fourth John if it wasn’t for Diotrephes— “I have written something to the church, but Diotrephes, who likes to put himself first, does not acknowledge our authority.”
John had apparently written something to the church, likely a letter of encouragement and counsel. But Diotrephes intercepted it, preventing the church from reading it. And John tells us why this letter was intercepted. Diotrephes intercepted the letter because he did not acknowledge John’s authority as an apostle, and rooted in that rejection was pride. As John describes it, he “likes to put himself first.”
We know little about Diotrephes beyond his character and actions described in these two verses. We don’t know his position, nor do we know his role. He could have been a corrupt pastor, maybe a crooked deacon, or perhaps just an influential church member. But, given the information in this letter, I think it’s safe to say that he possessed some type of influence or authority within the church, given his ability to reject John’s instructions, impact who was welcome, and cast out church members.
As we’ve seen in his letters, John has no problem calling someone a false prophet or antichrist. He’s quick to draw a line in the sand, separating those who are in and those who are out. Because of this, I find it interesting that he doesn’t use either of those titles to describe Diotrephes. This leads me to believe that we have two options here: (1) Diotrephes could be a false prophet waging war against the church, and John waits until he sees him face to face to pronounce such judgment against him. Or (2) it could be that Diotrephes was a believer caught in sin.
I think you could make an argument either way. Verse 11 seems to imply that Diotrephes’ actions are evil, which means he has not seen God. But, in that same breath, John doesn’t accuse Diotrephes of heresy or denying Christ. He doesn’t point-blank call him a false prophet or antichrist. So it could be that John is using such serious language as a warning to Diotrephes and the church that these actions cannot and will not be tolerated within the church. 1 Timothy 3 says, “[An overseer/pastor/elder] must not be a recent convert, or he may become puffed up with conceit and fall into the condemnation of the devil.”
Therefore, we could be seeing firsthand the fruit of placing someone in leadership too soon. We could be seeing a church leader who has allowed pride to creep into his heart and distort his leadership.
I always tell college students aspiring to become pastors to be careful and to allow God to lead them into that role in his time. Before the church becomes a place you work, it needs to be a people you love. Before you ever stand in the limelight, you need to labor in the shadows. Before you get a check from the church, you need to serve the church for free. Before you ever lead the church, you need to be led as a member of a church. Before you ever teach the church, you need to be taught as a member of the church. Don’t thrust yourself into a leadership position before you’re ready, and don’t appoint people as leaders before they’re ready. It’s tempting to elevate charisma over character and thrust someone into a leadership position before they’re ready. But, we should heed the warning in Scripture and be slow to crown someone as a leader before they’re ready because pride and conceit are easy to give in to, and conceit and condemnation are close friends. Leaders need time to fail, to be humbled, to be sanctified, to be encouraged, to learn, to process, and to wrestle with their call.
So, it could be that Diotrephes is a false prophet, or it could be that he is a church leader or influential church member who is behaving sinfully. Either way, his actions are not Christ-like; they are evil. And they must not be tolerated within the church.
Diotrophes was a common Greek name during this time in the Greco-Roman world. And, if you remember, this letter was likely written somewhere between 85 and 95 AD. If that’s the case, John is likely the last living apostle. Therefore, we’re on the cusp of transitioning out of this apostolic age. So, it could be that Diotrephes no longer saw the importance of John. It could be that he thought John was old and outdated, and that it was time to pass the torch to the next generation of church leaders. It could be that John was a threat to his position of authority. Or it could be that John was encouraging something that went against his own vision for the church. We don’t know much about why Diotrephes acted the way that he did other than his actions were rooted in pride. All we know is that Diotrophes “loved being first,” and this love for being first has led to a mess within the church.
So, what I want us to do is try to summarize some of the corrupt characteristics found within this man. In doing so, we will seek to draw some applications regarding a healthy and unhealthy church culture.
The first thing we see is that he likes to put himself first. His life was marked by pride. He wanted to be the center of attention. Instead of serving others, he served himself. Instead of supporting others, he supported himself. Instead of allowing the glory of Jesus to rule his every decision, he allowed the glory of self to rule his every decision.
Friends, pride is a dangerous thing. It’s a poison that will slowly lead to your own demise. But it’s also a sin intended to destroy those around you. Pride is like a spark in a dry forest. It will spread farther and faster than you ever imagined, destroying things you never intended to destroy. This man’s self-centeredness prevented the church from experiencing the blessing of encouragement or rebuke through John’s letter; it prevented the church from experiencing the blessing of encouragement from the presence of the brothers; and it drove members of the church out of Christian fellowship.
No sin ever impacts just you; it will always affect those around you. The implications of sin will always go farther than you ever want them to go, and pride has a strange way of blinding you to how your actions affect those around you. It hardens your heart to the reality that your actions impact others. The self-centered man doesn’t care about how his actions impact others; he only cares about how others can impact him.
What a stark contrast in men we have in this letter. Gaius was giving his life, time, and resources to support others who were carrying the gospel to those who had never heard it before. In contrast, Diatrephes was exerting effort to prevent others from carrying the gospel to those who had never heard it before. Gaius was selfless; Diotrephes was selfish. Selfless humility is fertile soil for gospel advancement, while self-centeredness is the weed that seeks to choke out gospel advancement.
A healthy church consists of men and women who are eager to put others before themselves. In using the words of Jesus, “The first will be last and the last will be first.” We bow low so Christ may be lifted high. When we crucify our egos, the beauty of the church blossoms. The strength of the church is found in hearts content with second place. And the strength of the church is crippled by hearts striving for first place. Be careful, friends, not to be driven by pride or ambition.
The second thing we see is that Diotrephes rejected apostolic authority— “I have written something to the church, but Diotrephes, who likes to put himself first, does not acknowledge our authority.”
The language here implies Diotrephes is inserting himself as the ultimate authority of the church. He’s turned his nose up at John and scoffs at his leadership and teaching. He’s rebelling against the divine authority that God has put in place over his life.
John was an apostle. The word apostle means “one who is sent.” An apostle was a special messenger with a special title who took a specific message to a specific people. So, the message John and the other apostles proclaimed was God’s message, not man’s message. In Luke 6:13 and Mark 3:14, we see Jesus choose for himself twelve disciples whom he named apostles. He called them to himself, taught them, and sent them out to preach his message. These were men who personally walked with Jesus, who were personally called by Jesus, who were personally taught by Jesus, and who were personally sent out by Jesus to preach the message Jesus had taught them. An apostle was a divinely appointed church leader responsible for proclaiming God's divine message. So, to reject John’s message was to reject God’s message. Diotrephes had allowed selfish ambition to blind himself to obedience to God.
What a terrifying reality, one we’re all tempted to follow. For us, the ultimate authority is God’s word, the Bible, the Holy Scriptures. That is the authority every one of us, pastors included, submits to. No church member is exempt from submitting to authority. As pastors, we are called to submit to God’s authority, and we are called to teach what the Bible teaches and allow that to govern us. If the Scriptures claim Jesus is the only way to eternal life, we embrace him as our only hope and proclaim his name throughout the world. If the Scriptures say something is sin, we call it sin and strive to avoid it. If the Scriptures call something righteous, we call it righteous and strive to walk in it. If the Scriptures tell us to love God with all our heart, soul, mind, and strength, we strive to love him with every fiber of our being. If the Scriptures tell us to love our neighbor as ourselves, we seek to love our neighbors well.
A healthy church consists of men and women who submit to God’s authority. We humble ourselves and kneel before the King of kings, Jesus. The strength of the church is found in hearts that are willing to bow in submission to God’s rule. And the strength of the church is crippled by hearts unwilling to submit to God’s rule. The moment we become unwilling to kneel before the authority God has put in place over us is the moment we begin to unravel.
The next thing I want to see is that Diotrephes was a slanderer. He wasn’t simply rejecting John’s authority; he was seeking to destroy John’s reputation through slander— “talking wicked nonsense against us.” Diotrephes had begun to fabricate stories against John to recruit others to join him in his rejection of John.
Words possess great power. They can be used for good, and they can be used for corruption. They can be medicine or they can be poison. They can build up, and they can tear down. The book of James tells us that the tongue is a “restless evil, full of deadly poison. With it we bless our Lord and Father, and with it we curse people who are made in the likeness of God.” Diotrephes had begun to use his tongue as an instrument of destruction. With it, I’m sure he corporately blessed God. But with it, he also corporately cursed man. With his words, he’s slowly setting the church on fire.
A healthy church consists of men and women who seek to use their words to build others up. The strength of the church is found in lips eager to speak truth in love. And the strength of the church is crippled by lips willing to gossip or slander. May our words be medicine that offers healing, not a poison used to destroy.
Now, notice what John strives to do here, though. John moves toward his offender, not away from him. He doesn’t overlook conflict; he moves toward it. John has written a letter to the church, which Diotrephes put a halt to. He’s sent the brothers to the church, which he’s put a halt to. And now he’s, in his old age, going to attempt to come to see him face to face to address him.
If I'm honest, John’s example is tough to follow. I hate conflict, so I tend to run away from it, not toward it.
As I surveyed my heart this week, I’ve begun to realize that sometimes, I mistake fear for grace. At times, I’ve felt I’ve been gracious and merciful, when in reality, I’ve just let the fear of conflict keep me from addressing an offense. Grace and mercy are sometimes found in overlooking an offense— “Good sense makes one slow to anger, and it is his glory to overlook an offense (Prov. 19:11). But true grace and mercy aren’t found in overlooking alloffenses. Grace and mercy are displayed best when we are able to look our offender in the eyes and address them. May we follow John’s example in addressing sin face-to-face.
The next thing I want us to see is that Diotrephes refused hospitality and prevented others from showing hospitality— “he refuses to welcome the brothers, and also stops those who want to and puts them out of the church.” This is a stark contrast to the type of lifestyle Gaius was living. Gaius welcomed and supported the brothers, while Diotrephes refused them. Gaius sought to send the brothers out in a manner worthy of God, while Diotrephes kicked people out of the church who sought to support their missional efforts.
Part of faithful Christian living is being a welcoming people, especially when it comes to welcoming other believers. “We’re glad you’re here, come on in” should be words we use often! If Christ has invited us into his holy family, we should invite others into our family.
A healthy church consists of men and women who are hospitable. Our church will be most healthy when we have a healthy relationship with brothers and sisters from other churches. Our church will be most healthy when we use our resources to help our brothers and sisters from other churches. The moment we stop partnering with other brothers and sisters to the ends of the earth, we’ve journeyed into sin. The moment we begin to reject hospitality, we’ve journeyed far from God. May the Lord shut us down the moment we begin to shut our doors to those around us. The moment we begin to put ourselves first, we’ve journeyed into wickedness.
The Book of 3 John teaches us the importance of selflessness and humility within the church. To be a faithful church, we must stay close to Jesus. Gospel doctrine shapes gospel culture. We can tell if we’re walking in obedience to Jesus by the way we treat other Christians.